After running a few errands this afternoon, I stopped at the gym before heading to the grocery store and then on to pick up the kids. As usual, I had scheduled myself down to the very last second – I rushed through my workout and left myself just enough time to grab a few major [...]
Dear County Constable Officer: I owe you a sincere thanks for not ticketing my dumb ass as it sped merrily through a 45 mph work zone at 60 miles an hour. While, um, talking on my cell phone. I deserved that ticket and we both knew it. Although to be honest, I’m just glad you [...]
1. What possessed my son to spit on the bathroom floor tonight. (In his defense, he did it without thinking and was almost as horrified as me. “I’m so sorry, Mom!!” Tell it to the gypsies, kid.) 2. How someone walked off with my car keys after leaving the child care at the gym and [...]
This is what I’m dealing with, people. STILL. And you wonder why I’m half insane.
Dear Fellow Commuter: Well, well, well. My condolences. It’s quite the predicament you’re in, seeing as they clearly did not equip your Saab with an accelerator. Shame, that. Such a nice, shiny, expensive car, and it doesn’t have the ability to go faster than 30 miles an hour in a 60 mph zone.
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