Now I live in San Francisco - NonSoccerMom.com

2012, Summarized

NonSoccerMom — Mon, 31 Dec 2012 11:05:30 +0000

If you care to read them, you can find 2010â€²s end-of-year summaryÂ hereÂ and 2011 over here. Â If you write one, let me know in the comments â€“ I love reading these as much as I love writing them!

1. What did you do in 2012 that youâ€d never done before?

Finished graduate school. Interviewed for a job via Skype. Moved to California. Became the boss (which is different from being bossY, because we all know I’ve been THAT for a while).

2. Did you keep your new yearâ€s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Hereâ€s what I wrote for 2012:

Finish grad school.Â Check. I graduated from Arizona State University in May with a MA in Criminal Justice.
Improve my job situation. Â Big, fat check.
Make more of an effort to record family memories.Â Â Hahahahaaaaaaaaaaa. Ahem. Fail. Wait – I started using Instagram. Does that count?
Have more patience with the kids.Â Â You know, I think I may actually have done this. At least somewhat. It certainly wasn’t the original plan for me to be their sole caregiver for the latter part of the year, but doing so has taught me a lot about patience. Whether I always manage it or not, I certainly know how to better approach it by now.

If there’s one thing I’d like to do in 2013, it is plan for the future. I’ve been so wrapped up in the now that I’ve lost sight of where we may end up in twenty or thirty years, and you know. I’d like to be able to retire at some point.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes! My good friend BB. Unfortunately, I only got a couple months of enjoying that sweet baby before I moved.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No, thankfully.

5. What countries did you visit?

Not a single one. N and I went to Phoenix in May for my graduation, and obviously I made the trek from Texas to California (and back again for Christmas) but other than that, travel has been sparse. Hopefully that can be rectified in 2013. Traveling is one of my very favorite things to do, and the kids are both finally old enough to take along for the ride.

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?

More time. I’d like a 36-hour day, is that possible?

7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Oh, that’s a hard one. It’s been a big year. July was a banner month – I started a new position at a higher level, moved to my second-favorite city on the planet (Paris is the first, in case you’re wondering), and lived truly by myself for the very first time.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I’m pretty proud both of graduating with a 4.0 and getting a significant promotion. I went from managing proposals to managing people, which is a pretty big change.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I prefer to think of failures as learning experiences and life challenges. It’s only a failure if you allow it to be.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nope. The usual sinus crap, which I hoped to avoid by moving to a totally different climate but no such luck.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

An assortment of comfortable flats, because my beloved 4-inch heels simply aren’t practical when you live in a very hilly city and don’t have a car.

12. Where did most of your money go?

Moving expenses.

13. What did you get really excited about?

Have you really not been paying attention? Moving halfway across the country and up a rung on the career ladder was pretty damn exciting.

14. What song will always remind you of 2012?

Gangnam Style. That song is EVERYWHERE – even in my fourth-grader’s class, apparently.

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:

â€“ happier or sadder?Â Happier, definitely. I thrive on challenge and change, and this year has definitely offered plenty of both.
â€“ thinner or fatter?Â About the same as always, but sporting some killer leg muscles from all these hills. DEAR GOD, THE HILLS.
â€“ richer or poorer?Â That’s kind of a hard one. I make a lot more money than I did six months ago, but also live in one of the most expensive areas of the country. So all things being equal – about the same as before.

16. What do you wish youâ€d done more of?

Working out. Saving money. Sleeping.

17. What do you wish youâ€d done less of?

Fretting over the future. Things happen when they’re meant to. I know this, and yet I fret anyway.

18. How did you spend Christmas?

Visiting family in Texas. We flew into Austin on Christmas Eve to spend a few days with my parents before heading down to The Swamp to have a late Christmas with the in-laws.

19. What was your favorite TV program?

I’ve become somewhat more of a TV junkie in recent months. Now that I’m done with school I have the time for it, I guess. Hawaii 5-0,Â NCIS,Â Sons of Anarchy, Burn Notice and Psych are all still faves. My newest obsessions areÂ Supernatural and Grimm.

20. What were your favorite books of the year?

I read embarrassingly little, but hope to rectify that in 2013.

21. What was your favorite music from this year?

I listen to so many types of music, it’s really hard to pick a favorite. But you can’t go wrong with Metallica or Rob Zombie. Or *I* can’t. I do acknowledge that such music may not be the best option for say, my 94-year-old grandmother.

22. What were your favorite films of the year?

Y’all, I don’t think I’ve seen a damn thing. Not a THING. And if I did, it obviously wasn’t memorable in the least.

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 33, and as per usual don’t really recall the specifics of the day. Oh wait, yes I do. N bought me a Keurig (LOVE!) and we celebrated at home. I believe it was the first time I’d gone to work on my birthday in quite some time, thanks to years of conveniently-timed spring break. It was low-key, but I suppose that’s typical as you age.

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Living in the same house (or even state) as my husband. The latter part of the year, anyway. Haven’t lived with him since the beginning of July.

25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?

Same as always until July, when I became a Â scarf-wearing maniac. The weather and logistics of life in San Francisco have forced me to rework my style a bit. Tights and leggings with dresses. Cardigans over everything. Flats instead of heels, and the weather is so wildly unpredictable that it’s smart to always have a scarf and an extra layer in one’s bag (and I don’t carry a purse anymore. Always a larger messenger bag or backpack). Honestly, I probably dress up a little more than I did before, even though my office is more casual. Most of my staff wears jeans on the regular but I rarely wear pants to work anymore, just because I’ve found that a dress with tights and boots is a bit warmer. So I’d describe my style as practical without being boring.

26. What kept you sane?

Wine. You think I’m kidding. Never underestimate the soothing power of a glass of cabernet.

FINE, I’m kidding. FaceTime has been so great in terms of keeping in touch with family, and thanks to cheap airfare both N and my parents have kept us from being too lonely out here. Social media has also helped a great deal. Technology, man. Wave of the future.

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.

I listed it last year but if this year didn’t prove it nothing will: Anything worth having is absolutely worth working for. And as an addendum, if you want it just do it. You’ll never regret going for your dreams, but you sure as hell will regret living with a raging case of the “what-ifs”. Life’s just too short to spend wondering if you could have done something. Trust me. You can. And definitely should.

The post 2012, Summarized first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

A long-overdue update

NonSoccerMom — Mon, 03 Sep 2012 17:11:17 +0000

Over a month since my last post? D’oh. So much for posting regularly. I’ve been far better about updates on Facebook and Twitter, so that’s probably a better way to keep track if you’re so inclined (yes, even YOU, friends from Old Workplace who are the last holdouts left on EARTH. AHEM). Anyway, on to the best posting tool of the update-challenged – the bullet point:

The kids: My parents flew them out here on August 14, which left less than a week before they started school. I’m pleased to report that they’re doing really great. Fantastic, in fact. Both of them have taken to city life just like pros and Misty even complained when we had access to my parents’ rental car for a few days – “But cars are BORING! I want to take the bus!” All in all, their transition has gone so much smoother than I expected, and even better than I hoped. Lex settled into his new elementary school (4th grade, GAH) quickly and easily, and already has little video game-geek buddies both in the classroom and at his after-school program (more on that in a second). They love their new rooms, and although they’d be happy to just hang around the house and play Wii/computer constantly, I’m dragging them out into the city as much as possible: A) they need to get to know their new hometown, B) the weather here is FAR more conducive to outdoor activities than Texas and C) no one needs to stare at a screen for eleventy hours per day.
The schools: This is something else that worked out far better than even the best-case scenario I’d imagined. I’m pretty sure I already talked about getting Misty into the daycare located in my office building, which is pretty much every bit as awesome as you’d assume. It simply doesn’t get any more convenient than that. People are all “OH, you can go visit her throughout the day!” which I guess I might do if I had a breastfeeding infant or something, but no. I don’t do that with her because she’ll just throw a fit when I leave her there. So it isn’t more convenient in that regard, but in terms of drop-off/pickup, it just couldn’t get easier. Getting Lex registered for school was pretty stressful and confusing, thank you ever so much SFUSD. But after a panicked last-minute birth-certificate order from the state of Colorado (and for that, thank YOU, UCSF mail services) I finally got it sorted out, and after a tear-inducing TB test he was all clear to start on the 20th with everyone else. His school seems to be one of the higher-rated public schools in the city, is relatively close to my office and an easy bus ride from our house, so that is good enough for me. Finding him after-school care was almost as stressful, since the program located at his elementary was already running a wait list. After much cost-related gnashing of teeth, I finally realized I was low on options and enrolled him in the phenomenal (if expensive) programÂ hereÂ which is – wait for it – across the street from my office. The program buses him from school to the facility, which is fantastic. So in case you’re keeping track, I managed to work it to where both of my children are in walking distance for afternoon pickups. I win!
The old house: SOLD. Closed, gone, etc., thank the tiny baby Jesus in his tiny little manger. We made hardly any money at all, but that is fine. As long as we didn’t end up owing money I can deal. The main thing is that we are no longer homeowners. WOO!! Which brings me to…
The new Â house: Fantastic. My parents were a tremendous help during the few weeks they stayed in SF, so it is almost totally in order (save for the master bedroom, but it will get there eventually). Mom and I had to get creative with a few things and I still don’t know what I’m going to do with all of my crystal or any of the 40,000 blankets we apparently own, but I’m really happy with the way it has turned out. I’m not quite as enamored of the hardwood floors as I expected to be (I like to walk around barefoot, which tends to highlight every crumb and so has me reaching for the broom constantly, not to mention my constant fear that the floors will get scratched somehow), and I HATE the idiotic design and loading capacity of the dishwasher, but the house is great. It’s in an excellent location with easy access to public transportation, restaurants and parks (including Golden Gate), and has plenty of room for our current needs. I really got lucky to find something so quickly.
My job: Is going quite well, I think. I’m settling in, getting comfortable with my team and learning the internal policies at my new institution and the processes specific to California (thankfully, my knowledge of federal regulations was one thing that actually transferred). My staff seem to all like me pretty well so far, but it could just be that I bribed them with my mom’s buttermilk pie. Hard to say.
N’s job: This is the only item on our list that hasn’t simply fallen into place, and unfortunately it’s a big one. We just can’t justify him leaving his current job until something materializes out here, so for now he has to stay in Texas. He’s applying for everything he can and I’m working connections on this end like crazy, so I know it will happen soon. In the meantime, it sucks to have our family separated by several states – and not knowing when that will change – but we’re doing okay. I just keep telling myself that it isn’t forever, that he’ll be here before long and that it will all be worth it in the end.

The post A long-overdue update first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

In which I write a post with content. And also pictures. (The pictures are really key.)

NonSoccerMom — Sun, 22 Jul 2012 00:39:32 +0000

Unsurprisingly, I let time get away from me again but now I actually have things to report! We have a place to live! And Misty has a daycare! And both of these things are very! Exciting! And cause me to use poor grammar and multiple exclamation points!

I had arranged for a realtor to help me search rentals once I arrived in San Francisco, but she was having difficulty for some reason having to do with her licensing in San Mateo. Or something equally boring, I’m not really sure. At any rate, since she had yet to find us anything to look at, I was beginning to freak about the timing so last weekend I took matters into my own hands. I made appointments to tour apartments in a few different parts of town, and while I found one that I really liked (and that accepted cats and large dogs), it was pretty far south of where we wanted to be, especially once you added in the fact that Misty’s daycare was at the very upper corner of San Francisco, right near the ocean (more on that in a minute). It would have taken me ages to get her there every morning before work, and since I STILL don’t know where Lex will go to school (and THAT IS ALL I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT), that was pretty much a no-go.

So I kept looking for rentals online and on Sunday afternoon met the owners’ real estate agent at what would turn out to be The Place. This house is pretty much my dream, y’all. I love it. LOVE IT.

Technically it is only a two-bedroom, but the formal dining room can be completely closed off and so we’ll use it for a third bedroom. That’s fairly commonplace around here from what I can tell, and the square footage isn’t much less than what we’re used to. There’s plenty of storage in the kitchen and while some of the colors/paint schemes aren’t exactly what I would have chosen myself, the natural light and location can’t be beat. On a clear day, you can see the top of the Golden Gate Bridge from the front sidewalk. There is a well-maintained playground literally across the street, and Â a short walk downhill brings you to plenty of restaurants and shopping. Keep walking further and you’ll be smack in the middle of Golden Gate Park.

This isn’t the neighborhood we originally planned on – we were going for Outer Richmond, near the daycare we’d secured for Misty. I loved the house so much I didn’t care and was fully intending to make the arduous trip from Golden Gate Heights to her school every day. But as luck would have it, shortly we found out that the homeowners accepted our lease application – I discovered that the daycare located AT MY WORKPLACE had a single pre-k vacancy. The daycare is on the second floor, I work on the fourth. I went downstairs, toured the facility and signed her up on the spot.

So now we have a place to live, we have a wonderful, super-convenient place for Misty to stay during the day, and I think we do actually have a couple of elementary school options for Lex (fingers crossed, OMG because it is a big fat maybe, and I can’t do anything about it until I have proof of residency anyway and I SAID I didn’t want to talk about it, WHY ARE YOU PUSHING ME?). Really, everything is falling into place even better than I’d imagined. Now all we have to do is figure out the actual logistics of moving our stuff and find N a job (details, details), and we’ll be all set to go. I’m beyond ready to have the entire family out here with me, but we’re getting there. It won’t be long now.

I hope.

The post In which I write a post with content. And also pictures. (The pictures are really key.) first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

Observations

NonSoccerMom — Fri, 13 Jul 2012 01:21:12 +0000

Totally copping out with a bulleted list already. I have to be honest, now I remember why my blog posting has always been so sporadic. It turns out that a lot of times I’m just flat not in the mood to write anything, especially not when there’s wine to be consumed and TV to be watched.Â (Or more specifically, several seasons of Supernatural to catch up on via Netflix. Seriously, how have I been missing out on this show since 2005? It’s like Charmed and The X-Files rolled into one, with an touch of horror movie campiness thrown in for good measure. Fun!)

Anyway, things are moving right along. I get up, get dressed, hike uphill (no really) to catch the bus, goÂ to work, learn stuff/meet people/work work work, then head back to the apartment, talk and/or FaceTime with N, the kids and my parents, then watch TV until it is time for bed. Second verse, same as the first. Maybe this weekend I’ll have something more interesting to talk about, but not so much at the moment. In the meantime here are a few things I’ve noticed over the last week or so:

It is way more pleasant to ride public transporation while listening to music – kind of like having a personal soundtrack – and as an added bonus, having earphones in keeps random strangers from striking up a conversation.
It is much, much easier to clean a 350-square foot apartment with one occupant than it is to cleanÂ aÂ 1900-square footÂ house that has four peopleÂ plus an indoor dog and cat. Duh, says you. AWESOME, says I.
Another for the DUH files: Being a manager is tooooooootally different than just being a member of the staff. That’s all I have to say about that.
I shouldn’t have taken free workplace coffee for granted. The only place to get coffee at my new office is down in the cafe, and that’s almost $2 a pop. Turns out there really is such a thing as the latte factor. You do get a (tiny) discount if you bring your own mug, but at the rate I drink coffee I’ll be broke in no time.

Huh. Turns out that even with bullet points I didn’t have much to say. Sorry about that.

The post Observations first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

In which I refuse to be defeated by public transportation

NonSoccerMom — Wed, 11 Jul 2012 01:23:58 +0000

In news that should come as a shock to no one: after all my gleeful exclamations about making public transportation my bitch, I got lost on the MUNI light rail this morning. Went inbound when I should have gone outbound and didn’t figure out the error until I was at the Embarcadero. Because I am dumb, and have the directional skills of a banana slug. But at least I discovered what I had done, and there are worse things to look at than the Bay Bridge while waiting for the correct train to appear. All in all I was only 5 or so minutes late to my training session, even after getting off a stop too soon and having to haul ass uphill to find a building which isn’t visible from the road.

Then after work I’m riding the (correct) bus and somehow the driver misses my call for a stop (or chose to ignore it) and I ended up having to walk from the next stop which was of course over 2 blocks away, in the middle of Union Square. Oh the humanity.

At any rate, work was fine, although I have a lot to learn about institutional policies and procedures before I feel comfortable. I guess that’s par for the course, and I am fairly certain that no one is yet expecting me to be an expert on the finer points of administration at a university where I have only been employed for 48 hours. In short, I survived another day. I know you’re all relieved.

The post In which I refuse to be defeated by public transportation first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

Just like a grownup

NonSoccerMom — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 01:40:10 +0000

Y’all! I managed to navigate the San Francisco bus system and get from point A to point B ALL BY MYSELF. You may not be impressed, but this is a big thing for me. Here’s the deal. Whenever we travel I have N as a guide (enabler) all the time, see, and so I don’t have to worry about the finer points of public transportation. Get on, get off, show my ticket as needed and look out the window at the scenery, knowing full well that my husband will poke me when it’s our stop.

But since he headed back to Texas this morning it is just me, Google maps and the MUNI bus schedule, and I am pleased to report that I did not get lost one single time, nor did I cry. Huzzah! Basic life skills FTW.

In related news, my first day at work went well. Everyone is very nice and I don’t think it will take long for me to settle in at all. I also was reminded of one of the many reasons to love California – I can virtually guarantee that there’s not an office cafeteria anywhere in Texas that has falafel on the menu. It is damn good falafel, too.

That said, I know the hugeness of this change has yet to fully sink in – although I am occasionally having moments of OMG I LIVE IN SAN FRANCISCO NOW WTF HOW DID THIS HAPPEN I CANNOT EVEN. It’s still all shiny and new for the moment, and reality has yet to bite me in the butt. I’m sure it will happen soon and no doubt when it does I’ll cry (AGAIN) for the life I left behind, but with each passing minute I know that moving here was the right decision.

The post Just like a grownup first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

Reboot

NonSoccerMom — Sat, 07 Jul 2012 21:47:55 +0000

I know, I know. Believe me, I am very aware that it has been entirely too long since my last post. I could give you a ton of excuses, but that’s exactly what they would be. The truth of the matter is, I’m just lazy. There’s been plenty to write about – finishing school, going to Arizona for graduation and a mini-vacation, Misty’s pre-k “graduation”, putting the house up for sale, which is of course related to the fact that I am soon starting a new job. In California.

Yep. This post is coming to you from a tiny studio apartment at the edge of Union Square in San Francisco. It’s a far cry from the comfortable familiarity of a mid-sized town in central Texas, that is for damn sure. This place is only temporary (thank the tiny baby Jesus in his tiny little manger because holy crap, some of the nearby neighborhoods are…questionable), but will give me a chance to sort out a permanent situation before the kids arrive in early August. In addition to starting a brand-new job, I have to secure daycare, find Lex a school, figure out how to navigate public transportation, and somehow find a place to live that is all of the following:

A – 3 bedroom

B – (relatively) affordable

C – dog and cat friendly, and

D – located in minimally sketchy surroundings

This will be harder than you’d think.

The logistics are going to be a nightmare, there’s no doubt about it. Not to mention, everything about living in an urban area is a departure from what I’m accustomed to. It will take an entire readjustment to my way of thinking before I can call this city home. I’ll have to get used to the fact that it will take ages to get where I’m going, I’ll have to wrangle two kids (one scatterbrained, one mulishly stubborn) using public transportation on the regular, everything costs an arm and a leg (except the groceries at Trader Joe’s, HUZZAH!), and there are incredibly vocal crazy people everywhere. No, really. EVERYWHERE.

But! I’m optimistic. I love a challenge, which is probably obvious otherwise I wouldn’t have accepted a job thousands of miles away in the first place. It’s a great opportunity to do something I’ve always wanted, and I’m grateful to have a husband that is willing to take the plunge along with me. The kids seem excited, as much as they can be with limited comprehension of what this actually MEANS to their wee lives, and I’m absolutely positive it will all work out fine in the end. We’ll move in, get settled, and soon SF will feel just as much home as any other place.

It will be an adjustment, but I’m a firm believer that anything worth having is worth working for. Complacency and acceptance of the status quo are boring to me, and the only way to live to the fullest is by changing up the norm. I’ll of course miss my “old” life – I had worked at that job for over 8 years and it was comfortable. Frustrating and crazy-making at (many) times, but at least I knew what I was doing. I’ve left all of my friends and family behind – no more weekend jaunts to my parents’ place just because the kids need a change of scenery. All of that is over now, and it is time for a new beginning.

That said, my goal is to write here far, far more often than before. Like near-daily, at least at first while I’m here alone. I’ll certainly have more time on my hands, and may as well use it. This blog won’t be just a place for me to moan and whine (as much) anymore (oh, who am I kidding. Come for the stories and brilliant commentary, stay for the bitching) – it can be a useful place to keep friends and family caught up on my life. Those who care to know, anyway. And if you fall into that category, then I promise to try and make it worth your while.

The post Reboot first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.