Transcript of a phone conversation with AE, who is staying with my mother this week:

Me: Hi, AE, are you having a good time at Nonna’s house?

AE: I can’t hear you.

Me, louder: HI, AE, ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME?

AE: I CAN’T HEAR YOU.

Me, much louder: AE. ARE. YOU. HAVING. FUN.

AE: I can’t hear you, I can’t hear you, I can’t hear you.

Me: CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?!

AE: Nope, I still can’t hear you! I CAN’T HEAR YOU.

Me, trying a new approach: Nonna says you went swimming yesterday.

AE: Can’t hear you!

Me, laughing: Put Nonna on the phone.

AE: I can’t hear you! Can’t hear you!

Me, still laughing: AE! Give the phone to Nonna!

AE: I can’t hear you. I can’t hear you! I can’t hear you! I CAN’T HEAR YOU!

Nonna, who can hear me perfectly: AE, quit that and tell your mom you love her.

AE: I love you! But I can’t hear you!