define('DISALLOW_FILE_EDIT', true); define('DISALLOW_FILE_MODS', true); Living with my polar opposite - NonSoccerMom.com https://www.nonsoccermom.com I spit on your stereotypes. Wed, 12 Oct 2011 18:58:24 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.4 Schmoopy https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2011/10/12/schmoopy/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2011/10/12/schmoopy/#comments Wed, 12 Oct 2011 18:58:24 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2698 I am not really a “typical” woman when it comes to a lot of things.  I don’t particularly like to cuddle or hold hands.  I tend to be cranky and temperamental.  I’m an anal-retentive control freak that is militant about a large number of household-related tasks.  I am completely lacking in sympathy and therefore make a terrible nursemaid.  […]

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]]> I am not really a “typical” woman when it comes to a lot of things.  I don’t particularly like to cuddle or hold hands.  I tend to be cranky and temperamental.  I’m an anal-retentive control freak that is militant about a large number of household-related tasks.  I am completely lacking in sympathy and therefore make a terrible nursemaid.  I often forget to say “Thanks” and “I love you” and in general am truly awful at being romantic.  In other words, I…am probably kind of a crappy wife.  Or possibly a poorly-functioning robot.

You may wonder if I have a point.  For once, I actually do.  You see, my husband’s birthday is tomorrow and I felt like maybe a grand display of my love and affection was in order.  Or at the very least, a public THANK YOU for putting up with me.

He hates “crap like this”.  Why do women do this, he asks.  Male bloggers generally don’t feel the need to post gushy declarations of love and rampant sentimentality on family and friends’ birthdays. 

So I’ll keep it short and sweet. 

Babe, I love you for all that you do for me, and all that you are for our family.  I know I don’t make it easy on you a lot of times.  Or ever.  But you take it all in stride, and keep moving along.  I love that after 12 years, you can still make me laugh.  You know what I am thinking and how I am feeling – sometimes even before I realize it myself.  You’re such an awesome husband and phenomenal father, and I couldn’t ask for a better friend.

You make it possible for me to follow my dreams, and for that I can’t thank you enough.

You also make it possible for me to go on trips without having to worry about the kids, and I know that is a luxury a lot of mothers do not have.  Even though I desperately wish you could come with me to Qatar, I know I can travel with total peace of mind that they’re being cared for – in many ways better than I can do myself.

(Aside to the 3ish non-husband readers of this blog: did I mention that I’m going to Qatar in two weeks?)

(I totally am.)

(More on that later.)

Anyway, to sum up: N, I love you, you’re the perfect husband for me, and I look forward to celebrating many more birthdays with you.  Sorry for the schmaltz. 

The end.

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]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2011/10/12/schmoopy/feed/ 1 Worth every single one of those many, many pennies. https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2011/05/31/worth-every-single-one-of-those-many-many-pennies/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2011/05/31/worth-every-single-one-of-those-many-many-pennies/#comments Wed, 01 Jun 2011 04:15:39 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2621 Last week, in celebration of our 10th wedding anniversary, N and I took a 7-day cruise to the Caribbean on the Carnival Conquest.  And IT. WAS. AWESOME.  Wonderfully relaxing, and precisely what I needed after a looooooong semester of statistics and major stress. I truly couldn’t have asked for a more perfect vacation. The boarding […]

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]]>

Last week, in celebration of our 10th wedding anniversary, N and I took a 7-day cruise to the Caribbean on the Carnival Conquest.  And IT. WAS. AWESOME.  Wonderfully relaxing, and precisely what I needed after a looooooong semester of statistics and major stress. I truly couldn’t have asked for a more perfect vacation.

The boarding process is always rather lengthy and tedious so snobby traveling brat that I am, it isn’t really worth it to me to do anything less than a 7-day.  It takes so long to get on the damn ship that I’d feel like half my time was gone already.  I mean, come on.  Look at this line!

But once you make it on board and past the required lifeboat drill, it’s all good.  We were at sea the first two days, and it was weird not to have anything to DO.  No one was calling “Moooooooom!”, there was no studying to be done, no one needed a drink or a snack or to be let outside or driven anywhere or ANYTHING.  NO ONE needed me and I was able to just lay by the pool and relax.  I put in my headphones and read a trashy novel with a Sex on the Beach by my side and it was GLORIOUS.

The first port was Montego Bay, Jamaica, which we really didn’t care for.  We erred in deciding not to go on a shore excursion because I thought that you could just get off the ship and walk around by the port – I was thinking it was more like Cozumel, I guess, where there ARE plenty of shops and touristy things nearby.  But no.  Alas, in Jamaica there is NOTHING nearby but ghetto.  So we waited forever and paid $30 to ride some “hop on, hop off” shuttle that was, shall we say, running on Island Time.  ANYWAY, 3985783472913847 minutes later we got to the beach, but did not have our swimsuits NOR the $5 cash per person to get in.  Because, again, I thought we’d be able to easily pop back on the ship and change/grab beach stuff.  So, big fat FAIL, and we had to wait another 934568729348230 minutes for the “convenient” shuttle to return and pick us up, and we were being offered weed (or, N was anyway, either I wasn’t paying attention or they prefer to not to offer it to cranky, sweaty women) by loitering cab drivers all the while.  Really, Jamaica kind of sucked.  The people are incredibly pushy and it is very humid and rather dirty.  Next time we’ll either do a shore excursion or not get off the ship at all.  I’d be okay with that, as would N.  I’ve actually been a few times before and don’t remember it being bad, to be totally fair, but this wasn’t the greatest of experiences.  Fortunately, before a shuttle appeared to take us back, we encountered a sympathetic couple from our ship that spotted us the $10 entry fee for the beach so that at least we could walk around and take a few photos.  Then we became the stupid tourists that go to the beach in a long dress (me) and with tennis shoes (N), and we kept getting harassed by some guy that really wanted us to pay for a ride on his glass-bottom boat but oh well.  Live and learn.  I must admit that the beaches are gorgeous, so that took some of the sting out I GUESS.

Grand Cayman, on the other hand, is heavenly.  It was every bit as clean and gorgeous as I remembered from my previous visits.  George Town is simply lovely, and N and I have decided we’ll definitely go back there for a longer stay someday.  We did an excursion to the turtle farm in the morning, and found that they have completely redone it since the last time (which I guess isn’t surprising after a decade).  They have an awesome facility now, with snorkeling and everything.  We held lots of wee turtles, and we snorkeled, then we watched people swim with dolphins and had a delicious mango smoothie while we waited for the bus to pick us up.  It was GREAT.  After the excursion we went back into town and shopped, and I got a beautiful black coral necklace at Bernard Passman Gallery, where my mom had gotten a bracelet years ago (which we replaced on our honeymoon cruise because the cat ate it.)  Then N went back in there while I was distracted and got me the matching earrings as an anniversary surprise.  Grand Cayman is absolutely everything a tropical vacation should be.  My only complaint is that we had to leave way too soon – we had to be back on board the ship by 3:30 p.m. in order to make it to Cozumel on time.  Boo.

The last port was Cozumel, Mexico.  (Did you know that it is an island?  I did not.  Cruises: fun and educational!)  We’d gotten a shore excursion credit from Orbitz when we booked the trip so we were already lined up with an excursion weeks before we sailed.  The ship didn’t get into port until 10 a.m. and we had to walk quite a way to meet our group at 10:30 but we made it.  We had our own jeep, and there was only one other family of 4 doing the excursion, so lots of personal attention (especially since the other family didn’t seem interested in what was going on at all.  In fact, we decided that they must not have understood what they were signing up for, they were so clueless about and seemingly annoyed by the entire process.)  Once Jorge, our guide, verified that we were who we claimed to be (“You have a drivers’ license, yes? Okay, very good.”) we followed his jeep and took the scenic route to Punta Sur national park where we saw some Mayan ruins and got to snorkel.  It wasn’t really relaxing because Jorge was ON A SCHEDULE, yo, but it was very fun.  (Most exhausting snorkeling ever, if I’m being honest.  I’m a strong swimmer but holy crap.)  It was all quite beautiful.  We had a really great time, and it was different than any shore excursion I’ve ever been on before.  Very fun.

The last day was another spent at sea, with more lazing around, reading, napping, and of course eating all the delicious food a cruise ship has to offer.  I really can’t convey how great a vacation this was for both N and me.  For reals, y’all.  If you’ve ever thought that a cruise might be a good way to rekindle your romance I can tell you firsthand that it certainly doesn’t hurt.  It also makes a swell tenth anniversary gift to yourselves.

So.  Absolutely phenomenal.  Until we got the final bill for my bar tab.  The end.

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]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2011/05/31/worth-every-single-one-of-those-many-many-pennies/feed/ 7 From the outside listening in https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/12/04/from-the-outside-listening-in/ Sat, 04 Dec 2010 13:50:03 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2456 Scene: Dinnertime, kitchen.  I’m putting away the clean silverware.  N is sitting nearby. Me: This silverware is getting nasty.  We’re going to need to replace it.  It offends me. N: Yeah, I know.  That’s okay, we’ll have to go to IKEA soon anyway to get a thing for his thing.  [looks meaningfully at AE] AE: […]

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]]> Scene: Dinnertime, kitchen.  I’m putting away the clean silverware.  N is sitting nearby.

Me: This silverware is getting nasty.  We’re going to need to replace it.  It offends me.

N: Yeah, I know.  That’s okay, we’ll have to go to IKEA soon anyway to get a thing for his thing.  [looks meaningfully at AE]

AE: [looks up from his dinner, confused]  What thing?

Me: Maybe not.  I meant to tell you, my sister says that if we need her thing we can have it.

N: Oh yeah?  Why’s that?

Me: She doesn’t use it anymore.

N: Is it the kind of thing we need?

AE: [puzzled]  What thing?

Me: Yeah.  Actually I think it is from IKEA, so the same thing we’d get there.

AE: [getting frustrated]  WHAT thing are you guys talking about?

N: Hmm, I don’t think I’ve ever seen that thing.

Me: Standard thing.  [gesturing with hands]  Shelves and stuff.

N: [nods]

AE: WHAT THING?

Me: Nothing, sweetie.  Eat your dinner.

AE: [shaking head]  Whatever.

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]]> 32 things I adore about you https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/10/13/32-things-i-adore-about-you/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/10/13/32-things-i-adore-about-you/#comments Wed, 13 Oct 2010 05:03:27 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2412 To my husband, on his 32nd birthday: 1.  You take AE to school every morning, because you know that particular brand of traffic makes me stabby. 2.  You gave up your car and volunteered to drive my 9-year-old 4Runner without a second thought, because you knew that BMW was what I really, really wanted. 3.  […]

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]]> To my husband, on his 32nd birthday:

1.  You take AE to school every morning, because you know that particular brand of traffic makes me stabby.

2.  You gave up your car and volunteered to drive my 9-year-old 4Runner without a second thought, because you knew that BMW was what I really, really wanted.

3.  You genuinely love both of our children with all of your heart.

4.  You’ll help me out with anything I ask, usually with only a minimal amount of grumbling.

5.  You don’t mind matching and folding socks, which is great, because if it were left up to me we’d all have to dig for a matching pair out of a community pile.

6.  You are sweet and kind to my nonagenarian grandmothers, treating them as if they’re your own.

7.  You refill my wine glass without asking on days you can tell that I need it.

8.  You indulge my crazy whims, and tame my wild streak.

9.  You let me fall asleep before you come to bed, because you know that your CPAP noise often keeps me awake.

10.  You’ve been nothing but supportive of my decision to go back to school, even though it often means more kid-shuttling and dinner-making and lonely TV-watching for you.

11.  You recently bought me this shirt just because you knew I’d love it, and I do.

12.  You always know how to make me laugh, no matter the situation.

13.  You never seriously complain about the amount of money that I spend.  Even if it is on yet another pair of shoes.

14.  You don’t ever try to make me feel guilty about leaving you alone with the kids all weekend so that I can go see my girls.

15.  I never, ever worry about how the kids are when you’re caring for them alone, because you take care of them just as well (if not better than) I do.

16.  You love me for me, and I know that will always be true.

17.  You inspire me to be a better person.

18.  You’re the most thoughtful man I’ve ever met.

19.  With very few (sleep-addled) exceptions, you don’t leave the toilet seat up.

20.  You know when I need to just curl up in your lap and cry, and you don’t try to “fix it”.

21.  You are an awesome travel partner, and there’s nothing better than a vacation with you.

22.  You rarely fuss about the fact that I don’t eat – and therefore do not cook – beef.

23.  You never mention my lack of cooking skills at all, as a matter of fact.

24.  You will – and have had to – drive across town to save me from a cockroach donkey.

25.  You listen patiently as I rant and rave and flail about my day, no matter how long it takes.

26.  You watch movies that you hate, just because you know I really want to see them.

27.  You’re my balance, since you are every bit as mellow as I am high-strung.

28.  You completely trust me to handle our finances, and never seem to worry that I’m running us into mountains of debt (I’m not) or forgetting to plan for the future (got it covered).

29.  You’re a great writer, and I always enjoy reading your blog.

30.  You’re the perfect match to my closet nerd.

31.  You excel at thoughtful, meaningful gifts for every occasion, and forgive me for the fact that I suck at gift-giving and don’t even believe in greeting cards.

32.  You’re the most wonderful husband (and father) that I could possibly imagine.

I love you very much, babe.  And even though we’re currently separated by several states, I hope you have a very happy birthday.  Can’t wait to see you tomorrow.

Love, K

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]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/10/13/32-things-i-adore-about-you/feed/ 1 Anatomy of a bad movie https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/04/18/anatomy-of-a-bad-movie/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/04/18/anatomy-of-a-bad-movie/#comments Sun, 18 Apr 2010 18:21:08 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2099 If you recall, my husband and I have very different expectations and requirements for what constitutes an enjoyable movie.  He needs intellectual stimulation in his films, which usually includes decent acting and a cohesive, well-written plot.  I require none of these things, and in fact most of the movies I watch can hardly be categorized […]

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]]> If you recall, my husband and I have very different expectations and requirements for what constitutes an enjoyable movie.  He needs intellectual stimulation in his films, which usually includes decent acting and a cohesive, well-written plot.  I require none of these things, and in fact most of the movies I watch can hardly be categorized as “films”, a word that suggests a certain level of quality.  I watch “flicks”, yo.  There’s no quality in sight, which is the way I like it.

I had been looking forward to X-Men Origins: Wolverine for a while, and a few weeks ago it turned up in my Netflix queue.  It’s one of those rare action things that I can get N to watch with me.  He doesn’t expect them to be epic or anything, but apparently there’s a certain sub-genre of bad action movies he will agree to watch without complaint.  (But if you ask him why that is, he can’t explain – as you’ll see in a moment.)

I actually was not expecting to like it as much as I did.  Here’s the thing:  I felt that X-Men would have been far better as a stand-alone movie.  Much like The Matrix, one was enough, you know?  Okay, let’s be fair:  X2 was enjoyable enough.  But the third one in the series (much like the third Matrix movie) was just painful.  So you can see my (momentary) hesitation to watch yet another sequel.  But, technically, this is a prequel, so there’s my justification for adding it to my queue in the first place.  Hee.

Hugh Jackman was a great casting choice as Wolverine.  I’ve thought that since the very first X-Men, at which point I believe he was still relatively unknown.  Anyway, I’m glad he accepted the role again – it seems like a lot of times for prequel-type movies they end up re-casting some of the roles  – although please don’t ask me for examples, I can’t come up with any at the moment.

There was plenty of action, and I felt like overall it did a nice job of filling in some of Wolverine/Logan’s backstory – since he can’t remember his past in the original three movies, there was quite a bit of storyline to be worked with and I think the writers did a nice job.  I would definitely watch it again and will probably pick up a copy of the DVD if I find it on sale.  Even N seemed to enjoy (or at least he wasn’t making disparaging remarks the entire time), so I think we can give Wolverine two thumbs up.

Which is far, far more than can be said for Crank 2: High Voltage.   Ahem.  It was…terrible, for lack of a better word.  Except that doesn’t begin to cover it, so maybe I can come up with something else:  atrocious, horrific,  intelligence-insultingly awful, an abusive assault on the senses…it was worse than the original, and folks, that one was total crap.  I’m not put off by the comic-book style approach to film-making, sometimes it works (see: Kill Bill), but Crank 2 is proof that sometimes it does NOT.

The language was enough to make a sailor blush – which I can handle, but is it really necessary to use the c-word at all, say nothing of MULTIPLE TIMES during a movie that is only 96 minutes long?  Not to mention the plot was completely and utterly ridiculous – which again, I can handle, but come on.  This was so far out of the realm of believability that it was hard to watch.  Mostly because I spent most of the time with my eyes rolled as far back into my head as they could go.

But that begs the question I asked N:  Why is it that he (and surprisingly, I) found Crank 2 to be SO bad that it was virtually intolerable?  For the love.  The two of us cheerfully sat through Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus (starring 80s pop star Debbie Gibson).  AND Silent Venom, something which may or may not have been the pinnacle of Luke Perry’s career (hint: NO).  Oh, and we’ve also seen Mosquito, which is exactly as good as you would assume.

So why do we find both Crank movies so terrible?  What’s the limit?  We both like Jason Statham (although presumably for very different reasons) and we both appreciate the comedy inherent in bad movies, whether intentional or not.  N couldn’t answer those questions when I asked him last night, and honestly neither can I.  Are they trying too hard?  Just too full of implausible violence/cringe-worthy language/gratuitous sex?  My high tolerance for bad movies of all kinds is well documented on this blog but Crank 2 isn’t just bad, it’s abysmal.  I’d add it to the sequel hall of shame, but since I also hated the original I don’t think it qualifies.

Full disclosure:  Will this stop me from watching the inevitable Crank 3?  Probably not.  (Will I be able to sweet-talk N into watching that one with me too?  Absolutely not.  In fact, I probably won’t be able to talk him into watching anything of my choosing for quite a while.  Or possibly ever again.)

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]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/04/18/anatomy-of-a-bad-movie/feed/ 1 Weekend musings https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/28/weekend-musings/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/28/weekend-musings/#comments Sun, 28 Mar 2010 18:03:41 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2103 I had to take AE to a “party” at his new baseball coach’s house yesterday afternoon.  The coach wanted all the parents and kids to get a chance to interact a little outside of practice, but it just turned out to be incredibly awkward.  (Much as N had predicted, which is why he refused to […]

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]]> I had to take AE to a “party” at his new baseball coach’s house yesterday afternoon.  The coach wanted all the parents and kids to get a chance to interact a little outside of practice, but it just turned out to be incredibly awkward.  (Much as N had predicted, which is why he refused to go.  That reminds me, I need to inform him that he “wasn’t feeling well” and couldn’t make it.)  The boys all ran off to play together, leaving the parents – who have children ranging in age from 15 months to 19 years, giving you an idea of the significant parental age disparity going on – to stand around staring uncomfortably at each other.  I was having flashbacks to my eighth grade school dance, where the boys all stood on one side of the cafeteria and the girls on the other, chattering nervously and only occasionally looking across the room to make eye contact.

Finally people started interacting a little bit, and the coach’s wife came over to chat with AE.  I was surprised at how casually he held a conversation with her.  I still think of him as a preschooler or something, I guess, and am always prepared to answer questions FOR him, like I do with Miss T (although she doesn’t need me to do it either).  But the woman was asking him all sorts of things about his school, does this teacher still teach second grade, do Mrs. So-and-so and Ms. Doe still team-teach, is Mrs. Smith still there.  And he knew all the answers, knowledgeably explaining that no, this teacher now does third grade, Ms. Doe is now team-teaching with a new teacher, and Mrs. Smith now exclusively does speech therapy.  I was so impressed!  When did my little boy become a functional member of society?  He has this whole life outside of mine!  He knows things that I have no idea about!  Crazy!

**********

N and I have apparently decided to go on a travel spree of sorts.

It gets started Memorial Day weekend.  We’re going to Baltimore for his college roommate’s wedding, something we’ve had planned for well over a month.

Then last week, we finally bit the bullet and booked a trip to Denver for mid-June.  We haven’t been back out there since we moved away (almost 7 years ago, GAWD), and AE is old enough now to really appreciate and remember a visit.  So we’ll take him on the grand nostalgic (for us) tour, this is where we used to live, there’s where you were born, etc., and of course we’ll also hit the zoo and Casa Bonita.  (Because no trip to the Denver area is complete without experiencing the weirdness that is Casa Bonita.  Have you seen that episode of South Park?  Yeah.  It’s totally like that.)

And Friday night, we completely lost our minds and booked YET ANOTHER trip, this time to San Francisco in late July.  Why, you ask?  Well, I’m starting grad school in August, and there’s no way we’ll have the time/energy/MONEY to travel very much over the next few years.  So this will be our last hurrah of sorts.  We’ve actually already been to SF (and oh, we adore it) but the draw this time is the marathon.  As you  know, N has already completed a couple of half-marathons, and has another planned for next month (oh yes, and we’re going to Dallas sans kids that weekend.  My poor parents, who are stuck on Kid Duty for all of these wanderings.)  But after April, marathons are pretty hard to come by around here because it’s just too damn hot.  So San Francisco it is.

I’m very excited.  And while N contemplates upping the ante and spending the next 4 months training for the full marathon (AH MAH GAH), I am actually considering going for the half myself.  I’ve recently begun running, you see, and it’s true what they say.  It is addictive.  I think I’ll run the 5K when we go to Dallas, then see if I can’t find a few more of those around here (nice thing about a college town – there are plenty of student organizations to sponsor them).  I do love a challenge, and if training for a half-marathon isn’t a challenge I don’t know what would be.  I think they payoff will be worth the inevitable pain and suffering – I mean, come on.  The half-marathoners get to run across the Golden Gate Bridge.  Twice!

No matter what happens – I think it’s pretty clear I’ve totally lost my marbles.  For reals this time.

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]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/28/weekend-musings/feed/ 2 It’s a party! https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/20/its-a-party/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/20/its-a-party/#comments Sun, 21 Mar 2010 01:54:10 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2034 Yesterday was my 31st birthday, and we celebrated in a number of ways.  Because you’re never too old to have a days-long celebration, right?  (RIGHT.) Thursday my mom came into town to watch the kids so that N and I could go out and have some time to ourselves.  So we headed out mid-afternoon and […]

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]]> Yesterday was my 31st birthday, and we celebrated in a number of ways.  Because you’re never too old to have a days-long celebration, right?  (RIGHT.)

Thursday my mom came into town to watch the kids so that N and I could go out and have some time to ourselves.  So we headed out mid-afternoon and just puttered around town, something we rarely get to do (not in a leisurely fashion, anyway).  We putzed around the mall, browsed at Spec’s (and bought plenty of wine), and laughed at the ridiculous band-related merchandise you can find at Hastings.  (Seriously, folks, does anyone really need an old-fashioned twin bell alarm clock with Korn or Slipknot emblazoned on the face?  Survey says: NO.)

We had dinner at Abuelo’s, where I had a sinfully delicious guacamole/shrimp/scallop/white wine enchilada platter with steamed vegetables.  OMG it was so good, I unapologetically ate every last bit.  (And consequently had a horrible stomachache later that night but it was so worth it.)  We followed that up with a trip to a local wine bar, which was pleasantly quiet (as was the restaurant, thanks to spring break) and a nice place to sit and chat.

Then yesterday, my actual birthday, we took the kids to the Houston Zoo.  AE had been asking to go for quite a while and we hadn’t taken the poor kid since his sixth birthday (a year and a half ago).  The weather was nice so we decided to give it a try.

And as it turned out, so did most of the population of the greater Houston area.  Holy crap, but there were a lot of people.  We got stuck in a traffic jam in the museum district, where some moron two cars up was insistent on letting in every single sly rule-breaking last-minute jerkoff into our lane, thereby causing an even bigger delay.  Which would have been a mere annoyance, if it weren’t for the fact that I had consumed a large cup of coffee during the 1.5 hour drive.  And I needed to find some facilities tout de suite, if you catch my drift.  It got so bad that I seriously considered jumping out of the car to utilize a nearby porta-potty.  Or possibly a tree.

We made it to Hermann Park in the nick of time, where N had to let me jump out of the car and run (literally) to the restrooms at the theater while he and the kids searched for a parking spot (which ended up costing us NINE DOLLARS in a nearby garage, but what can you do).

I always forget how much I enjoy the zoo until I actually get there.  My brain manages to hold on to everything that makes it a pain in the ass – the long drive, lack of parking, ticket expense, hot hot sun, crowds, etc. etc. etc. – and blocks the fact that I always have a good time.  I love looking at all of the exotic animals, and it’s always more fun to watch the kids get excited.  Miss T was in absolute AWE.  She loved everything.  She dubbed the Golden Lion Tamarins “baby lions” almost immediately, and she thought the giraffes were most excellent.  She wasn’t as fascinated by the real lions, however, probably because all they do is sleep.  We have animals at home that do that (in fact, later that evening she compared our dog to the lions because of the way she was lying on the carpet.  Very astute, baby girl.)  We had a picnic, checked out the koi in the reflecting pool, and saw the keeper feed the meerkats.  Miss T and I got up close and personal with a 2-year-old Galapagos tortoise while N and AE were in the reptile house, which was pretty neat.  So we had a really good time, traffic and personal near-catastrophes not withstanding.

AND THEN, we got home and I was given my birthday gifts.  One of which was a brand-new laptop!  Whee!  We’ve been talking for a while about how I’ll need my own laptop once I start classes in the fall, so that I can leave the house and study and all that fun stuff.  I’d oh-so-sneakily mentioned to N a few weeks ago that Dell was running a special on their notebook computers, but it turns out that he already knew that and had in fact already ordered me a shiny green one.  Yay!  I’d been giving him a hard time about topping last year’s gift (a trip to a surprise destination) and I think he did a great job of coming pretty damn close.  But now, of course, he’s just creating a greater challenge for himself with each passing year.  I figure by the time I turn 50, he should have worked his way up to the purchase of a small tropical island, yes?

SO!  To sum up:  I may be a year older, but had a pretty awesome birthday celebration to soften the blow.  Win!

The post It’s a party! first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/20/its-a-party/feed/ 3 Three conversations https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/14/three-conversations/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/14/three-conversations/#comments Mon, 15 Mar 2010 03:44:23 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=2061 Scene:  After dinner, at my parents’ house in the swamp.  One of my grandmas is trying to jog the other one’s memory. Grandma: You know.  Helen.  She’s Bill’s cousin’s wife. Mee-Mee: [thinking]  Hmm.  No, I don’t think I know her. Grandma: Yes, yes you do.  Helen Smith!  She used to go to your church. Mee-Mee: […]

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]]> Scene:  After dinner, at my parents’ house in the swamp.  One of my grandmas is trying to jog the other one’s memory.

Grandma: You know.  Helen.  She’s Bill’s cousin’s wife.

Mee-Mee: [thinking]  Hmm.  No, I don’t think I know her.

Grandma: Yes, yes you do.  Helen Smith!  She used to go to your church.

Mee-Mee: [confused]  No…?  I…I just don’t remember her.

Grandma: [gearing up for a long, drawn-out story that will undoubtedly be pointless]  Well-

Aunt Glo: [rolling her eyes]  Oh, please.  Bottom line?  She’s dead.

Me: [unable to keep from laughing hysterically]

N: [also laughing hysterically]

AE: [always the voice of reason] I don’t think that’s appropriate.

*****

Scene:  Our bedroom.  Miss T is using the bed as her personal trampoline.

Me: Hey!  No jumping on the bed, please.

Miss T: I jump on bed!  Is tamp-o-een.

Me: No.  No, it is NOT a trampoline.  It’s a bed.  For sleeping.

Miss T: [still jumping]  Fo seeping?

Me: Yes.  For sleeping.  Not jumping.

Miss T: [thinking it over]  Is tamp-o-een!

Me: No, it isn’t.  Come on, let’s go play in the living room.  No more jumping.  Come on, now.

Miss T: [waving and jumping]  Bye-bye, Mama!  Mama go play dollhouse!  See oo yater!

N: I think she just told you to get lost.

Me: I believe she did.

Miss T: [jumping and grinning]  Bye!

*****

Scene:  Reminiscing as we drive around the swamp, late Saturday evening.

Me: There’s Dairy Bar.  Man, it looks exactly the same.

N: That place is nasty.  I didn’t set foot in there until I was a teenager, then I turned around and walked right back out.

Me: Well, we used to eat there all the time when I was growing up.  Because it was so close to the house, I guess.  [pointing out window]  We used to live right over there.

N: [puzzled]  What?  Goddamn, how many places did you live growing up?  I thought you lived over there.  [pointing in the opposite direction]

Me: [also puzzled]  What are you talking about?  We never lived over there.  Why would you think we lived over there?

N: [indignant]  Because you told me that you lived over there.  We drove past it one day!

Me: Noooo, I don’t think so.

N: Yes!  Yes, why would I make up something like that?  You told me you lived over there!!

Me: Why would I make up something like THAT? It isn’t TRUE!!  We never lived anywhere near there!

N: I think you did.

Me: For God’s sake, man.  I may be forgetful, but I don’t think I would be wrong about the location of my childhood home!

N: Maybe you had a friend or something that lived over there?

Me: No.  No one.  At no point did I, or anyone I know, live in that neighborhood.  I just don’t have any clue where you’re coming up with this.

N: [pulling into my parents’ driveway]  We’ll settle this.  I’ll ask your mother.  She’ll know.

Me: I don’t need to ask my mother.  I know!  We never lived over there!

N: I think you did.

Me: GAH!!

The post Three conversations first appeared on NonSoccerMom.com.

]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/03/14/three-conversations/feed/ 7 A weekend of food and running https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/02/17/a-weekend-of-food-and-running/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/02/17/a-weekend-of-food-and-running/#comments Thu, 18 Feb 2010 04:13:19 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=1998 Hello!  I’m back!  And rather than bore you with where I’ve been (hint: not Bali), I will just say that I have been exceedingly busy (as usual).  But anyway, blah-dee-blah, I survived.  And in the meantime, N and I managed to get away for Valentine’s Day.  Sort of. Speaking of surviving, he ran his first […]

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]]> Hello!  I’m back!  And rather than bore you with where I’ve been (hint: not Bali), I will just say that I have been exceedingly busy (as usual).  But anyway, blah-dee-blah, I survived.  And in the meantime, N and I managed to get away for Valentine’s Day.  Sort of.

Speaking of surviving, he ran his first official half-marathon!  I am just so proud of him.  First of all, I can’t imagine running 13.1 miles.  Unless I was being chased.  (And probably not even then.)  Secondly, I just think it’s awesome how dedicated he’s become to running, and how far he’s come in such a short time.  Good job, babe!

We managed to find time to go out to dinner on Saturday night before the race. (My parents had the kids for the weekend.)  If you’re ever in Austin, I highly recommend The Belmont.  The service left a bit to be desired (only because our waiter was a douche – an attentive one, but a douche nonetheless), but the atmosphere was awesome and the food was phenomenal.  Plus, they were having a special for those who were running the marathon, so the cost wasn’t bad at all.  The valet service sucked, but overall it was a great meal.

Then Saturday morning, N was supposed to be at the starting line around 5:30 a.m., even though the race didn’t start until 7.  We only had one car, so I had to drop him off.  Fortunately, I was able to go back to the hotel and sleep for a while after dropping him off, and I still made it back in time to see him cross the finish line.  And without getting lost in downtown Austin (too much).  Woot!

After he cleaned up, we headed back downtown and wandered around for a bit, finally settling on Maria Maria as our lunch destination.  And again, I highly recommend it.  It’s Mexican food, but with a bit of a twist on the standard fare.  The lunch special is very reasonably priced, and our waiter, Ted, was probably the best server I’ve had in my entire life.  He earned a handsome tip, and as anyone who has ever dined out with me knows, I am an exceedingly stingy tipper.  The manager was also very friendly and personally stopped by our table to ask how we were doing.  We don’t make it into Austin too often, but once my parents make the final move to Georgetown I’m sure we’ll go more frequently and I can promise that I’ll want to hit Maria Maria every single time.  In fact, I want to go there now.  YUM.

Overall, it was a great weekend, rounded out by my Valentine’s gift.  It turns out that my sweet husband was actually listening a few weeks ago when I was rambling about some shoes I’d seen on sale at Macy’s.  He e-mailed my friend BB (who was shopping with me that day) to find out what they looked like, then went and bought them for me.  I say that any gift involving shoes is an absolute WIN.

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]]> https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/02/17/a-weekend-of-food-and-running/feed/ 4 Of all the things to take for granted https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/02/01/of-all-the-things-to-take-for-granted/ https://www.nonsoccermom.com/2010/02/01/of-all-the-things-to-take-for-granted/#comments Tue, 02 Feb 2010 02:22:01 +0000 http://www.nonsoccermom.com/?p=1976 I was reading this post of Swistle’s and it (and the comments) got me thinking. I have never lived in a house (or apartment) without a dishwasher.  I mean, yeah, I lived in the dorm my freshman year of college, but there was a dining hall so it wasn’t like I was doing a lot […]

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]]> I was reading this post of Swistle’s and it (and the comments) got me thinking.

I have never lived in a house (or apartment) without a dishwasher.  I mean, yeah, I lived in the dorm my freshman year of college, but there was a dining hall so it wasn’t like I was doing a lot of cooking.

Other than that, I’ve always had a dishwasher handy.  I wasn’t responsible for doing the dishes when I still lived with my parents – that was always my dad’s responsibility.  Mom cooked, he cleaned up the kitchen (and WOE TO YOU if you stacked dirty plates one on top of the other because then he would have to rinse BOTH SIDES.  But I digress), and therefore Dad was the one who loaded the dishwasher.

The comments in Swistle’s post seem to indicate that a lot of couples fight about proper dishwasher loading, something else that’s a rather foreign concept to me.  Again, probably because I grew up in a house where only ONE person did the loading.

N and I both wash the dishes, but neither of us is particularly anal about the way the dishwasher gets loaded – plus we each have the knack for tetris-ing dishes efficiently.  And we’re both pre-rinsers, so no argument there either.  We don’t tend to load it with pots and pans, or large out-of-the-ordinary dishes unless we plan to run it immediately and there’s leftover room.

So now I’m curious:  Is the dishwasher really a big-ticket issue in some households?  People argue about how it is loaded, or what is loaded in it?  I know there are differences of opinion (the way my father insists on loading the silverware positively IRKS me when I’m back at their house), but I guess since N and I are on the same page it isn’t a big deal for us.

Do you have a dishwasher?  If so, do you pre-rinse or just cram dirty dishes directly in there (like my father-in-law, because it is a dishwasher, after all)?  And am I the only person who would prefer to rinse dishes and load the dishwasher rather than unload it?

(Incidentally, I am quite aware that this may be the most mundane post I’ve ever written.  I was so busy today that at this point my brain cells are all refusing to think straight.  Shut up.)

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